There are wooden doors with windows, metal ones without. Doors to rooms, doors to houses, doors to our hearts. A door to my house that was kicked in during a home invasion and robbery. In a matter of seconds, pounding kicks followed by our screams and yelling to the burglar getting away with a small bag and my wallet. I have never been so scared in my life. My heart has never raced faster. The whole time I was holding my baby girl in my arms. A new level of protective mama bear goes into action. (That would be stay out of the way and pray action!) We were left with a door kicked in to replace, a dreaded visit to the DMV for a replacement license, and replaced debit cards. All replaceable things.Why did it take someone knocking down my door for me to acknowledge my heart in a new, real way? To fall on my knees in complete desperation and fear before the Lord. I love Jesus and I understand the power of prayer... but yesterday it hit me. I have a blessed, privileged life. I don't live in a state of fear, thank goodness. This is hopefully our one and only home invasion in a lifetime. I pray that, I hope that. I wouldn't wish this upon anyone. The fear, the worry, the anxiety that follows. The sleepless night. 5 am comes around and I wake up peeking out the windows, checking the locks once more. Those emotions that flood in are intense, they are real and legitimate. Instead of living in that fear, I found myself praying aloud for God to protect my family. For us to know what to do, to see His hand even in the most terrifying experience. It took this awful, terrifying incident for me to seek God's presence in a new, big way. It seems backward, doesn't it?... to find power and praise in the worst of situations.
My truths I cling to...
God is bigger and more mighty than this criminal. He will prevail.
My God is just and this thief is an idiot. He will be caught. I just know it!
Mr. Idiot Thief stole my joy yesterday, he will not steal it today.
New doors, new locks, lots of lights, and one amazing husband who will check the house for me at all hours of the night make me feel a little more safeguarded.
We are equipped to provide and protect our family.
Syd won't remember this... thank goodness. I pray for her innocence to stay in tact as long as possible.
I may not understand who, why, or what this moron was thinking. It's beyond my understanding. The Lord knows this person's tainted, desperate heart. He will face his day in court and before the Throne one day. My God's gonna kick your door down, buddy. Watch out.
Righteousness and justice are the foundation of your throne. Unfailing love and truth walk before you as attendants. psalm eighty nine: fourteen
